#59 Ma-Ti Drew The Short Straw.

So if you’re starting a unit that’s sole purpose is to save the planet; earth, fire, wind and water are absolutely magnificent powers to dish out to your team members. But you know what isn’t? Heart. Heart isn’t a good idea in the least bit. Basically my man, Ma-Ti was given this lame power and told to instill care, concern and passion into the people of this world, forcing them to care for the planet. That’s WEAK. Ok, it wouldn’t be weak if it just happened to you randomly today but it is weak in comparison to being able to control the earth, fire, wind or water. The coolest part of Ma-Ti’s gifts was that he could communicate telepathically with animals. Essentially he’s just a glorified Dr. Doolittle who can persuade you to go green. So while his friends were capable of starting an earthquake under your feet, lighting you on fire, putting you in the eye of an F5 tornado and drowning you – the worst Ma-Ti could do is convince you to pick up trash and recycle a water bottle, then talk to your dog about it. Riveting.


15 responses to “#59 Ma-Ti Drew The Short Straw.

  1. I hated that show but yeah he really got hosed when it came to superpowers. It’s like that kid on superfriends who his sister could turn into a hawk or whatever while he could only turn into stupid crap like a bucket of water. Dude nobody’s going to want to buy that dork’s action figure.

  2. Of course outside of combat ma-ti had some uses for his power but he couldn’t fight, at all. the other Planeteers have potentential for whoop ass but they never get that creative with thier attacks and have to yell the same phrase every time they use their powers which would get tiring after a while. also none of them knew much hand to hand so they’d get captured constalntly.

  3. I think FART would be more useful than HEART. Although, if he stood too close to Wheeler, It would have been one heck of a blue angel. If you don’t know what a blue angel is, here’s the definition.

  4. Is it me or does the asian looking chick from captain planet kinda seem like an older version of the asian girl wanda from the magic school bus?

  5. Pingback: Ma-Ti will destroy the world « Z0MGHACKS!

  6. This is so true. When we played Captain Planet as kids, no one was ever Ma-Ti.

  7. lmao yeah, I always thought he had the lamest freakin power. It just didn’t go with the others. Even watching it when I was younger, it boggled my brain.

  8. AL-WAYS. He always did. What a great show though!!

  9. favorite show ever! i still remember the theme song!

  10. Thing is, whenever he used his power on the bad guy, it was like some super Green mind-control ray. It was an all-powerful instant-win button. But he never used it that way, because that would be boring.

  11. Yes! The worst part about playing planeteers was deciding who was going to be heart. Me and my friends left heart out altogether or took turns being it.

  12. Avatar wouldn’t have been as exciting if they had a Heart Kingdom. Then the Fire Kingdom wouldn’t have attacked anyone. I also imagine the Heart Kingdom would have essentially been Care Bears.

  13. Pingback: Earth! Wind! Water! Fire! Heart! Go Planet!: A Captain Planet Movie? | Political Jesus

  14. This shit is not even fair, dawg; I, seriously, can’t breathe, over here, I’m laughing so hard. I mean, this shit really hurts – I kiiiiiiiinda’ didn’t realize this shit when I’s, like, 8-9, but all of us know that we realized it on a subconscious level. It was, like, Ridley would come n’ be, like, “Fiiiiiiirrrrrrrrre!!!!” Then, all of us would be like, “Yeeeeeeaaaaah,” n’ we were all so ready to get busy n’ crush Lootin Plunder, but then, by the time they got around to this lil’ muf’ we’d just be like, “You in the way, dude! Get the f’ out the way, dude!” I can’t believe how eerie it is that we were all on the same train of thought (as kids,) but could never express ourselves or connect with each other(no internet) like these young punks today. Kudos on this blog, man…

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